July's Love Tip of the Month


“Opposites attract because they attempt to move towards the center that lies between them.  Two opposing qualities, personalities or viewpoints complement each other because they inspire awakening – which brings positive change, if you let it.”

So here we are, smack dab in the middle of Summer.  That doesn’t meant you have to let conflicts get you heated!  Let the “opposites” of your relationship bring you closer together when you meet in the middle.  Polarized attributes can bring about some really monumental transformation – and it doesn’t require fussing and fighting (although indeed, struggle is often part of change, even positive change).  Here are three ways to keep you focused on celebrating your differences:

1.)  Acknowledge the fact that you have attracted this person into your life.  If he’s a procrastinator, you may have an innate need to motivate others.  Regardless of his personality traits, there is something in you that craves his ways.  Take responsibility for your role in the relationship, and you will immediately gain power – because you are only in control of your own thoughts and actions…not his.

2.)  Try to remember what initially attracted you to your mate.  Was it his determined, “Type A” personality?  Oftentimes the traits that first attract us to someone end up being the same traits that get on our nerves after a few years.  This is because we instinctually desire growth, and what we are attracted to invariably produces personal growth.  So was it his aggressive personality something that you were attracted to in the beginning?  What changed?  Was it because it caused you to change?  How so?

3.)  Remember that whatever others do, it’s their own way of seeking love.  As strange as it may be to apply to this theory to actions stemming from anger, fear, neurosis and sadness, everything we do is to get closer to love.  We call each other names because it makes us feel more important, and therefore more lovable.  We are too afraid to step out of our comfort zone because we don’t want to be judged, and therefore less lovable.  Always try to look at your mate’s less desirable traits and examine how he or she is really seeking more love.

This is why it’s important to meet in the middle.  Our own individual personality traits are each beautiful in their own way, but when we get too “off-center”, it indicates an imbalance of our love for ourselves.  When we become too fearful, too domineering, or too passive, it means that we’ve lost some control.  Respect your partner’s differences, as their influence may be exactly what you need in your life.  Enjoy the move toward the center, as center equals equilibrium – also known as peace of mind.

Enjoy the rest of July!



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